Chim Chimney

15 Aug


So it’s that time of year when responsible people call a professional chimney sweep to come clean out their fireplace in preparation for the upcoming winter months.  At this very moment I’m sitting here looking at my fireplace with dread.  Not because of the fire.  I love the fire.  It’s because chimney sweeper people creep me out worse than clowns.  For the record, I’ve never seen a dapper Mary Poppins-esque chimney sweep.  Like EVER.  The ones I’ve encountered drive station wagons and wear a rental costume and top hat and carry modified toilet brushes.  I’m not sure what I was expecting from Mother Stoker Smoker Pokers.  Something a bit less pervy maybe.

I’m to the point where I think I’ll just risk a chimney fire in lieu of a traumatic chimney sweeper visitation.  Perhaps it’d be in my best interest to pop on over to the National Chimney Sweep Guild site to read their handy-dandy list ‘o tips about doing your homework to prevent the hiring of a pervy sweeper.  It would behoove all fire-starters to do the same.


2 Responses to “Chim Chimney”

  1. Michael Cargill August 15, 2014 at 9:14 am #

    I had no idea that coal fires were still a thing. Get a gas ‘un and run the gauntlet of having a creepy bloke from the gas board popping round every so often.


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